Giving Up

I was hopping to have good baby news for this week...I had high hopes because the treatment was giving good results all along...I responded well to the treatment and I had two strong possibilities of becoming pregnant...but there is no baby news...I got my mothly visit yesterday afternoon...I guess my age won the battle...So, I am giving up...It is hard to explain...I am not sad just disapointed...I can not be sad for something I have not lost because I never had it...It is just plain disapointment...On the other hand, I am happy for the gift I received almost 7 years ago...He is a wonderful boy, very smart and healthy...I could not ask for more...God answered my prayers then and gave me a bundle of joy represented in Nathan...My pride...So, it is time to move on and dedicate the rest of my life to him and Emil...The two men in my life...

Tenia esperanzas de tener noticias de bebe esta semana...Tenia muchas esperanzas porque el tratamiento me estaba dando buenos resultados todo el tiempo...Respondi bien al tratamiento y tenia dos fuertes posibilidades de quedar embarazada...pero no hay noticias de bebe...Me vino mi visita mensual ayer en la tarde...Creo que la edad me gano la battalla...Asi que me doy por vencida...Es duro de explicar...No estoy triste solo deslilucionada...No puedo estar triste por algo algo que no he perdido porque nunca lo tuve...Es solo desilucion...Por otro lado, estoy contenta por el regalo que recibi hace casi 7 years....El es un varoncito esplendido, muy inteligente y sano...No pude pedir mas...Dios respondio a mis plegarias en aquel entonces y me dio plena felicidad representada en Nathan...Mi orgullo...Asi, que es tiempo de seguir adelante y dedicar el resto de mi vida a el y a Emil...Los dos hombres en mi vida...